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halfamoonTitle: Five Times Regina's World Ended
Fandom: Dark.
Characters: Regina. (Aleksander, Bartosz, Egon, Claudia, Mads, Tronte)
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Character death, spoilers for S3
Word count: 1488
Summary: Regina understands that this is the fifth time her world will end; it has ended so many times before, but this time it will be final.
It had been just another day to Regina; she’d gone to school where she’d spent the day keeping her head down, avoiding Katharina Albers and her little gang. At least sometimes at breaks Mads could keep her company, although sometimes he’d hang out with his friends from his own year, as he did that day. Still, at least she’d be able to catch up with him properly at their fencing class.
Mads had walked her home as usual after class, Regina had asked him whether things were okay with him and Ulrich now after the argument they’d had the night before, where his brother had told him to “leave him alone and get lost”. Mads had shrugged, said they were back to normal (from what Regina understood, it was quite common for Mads and Ulrich to be arguing one moment but for it to have blown over the next). “He can be a dick, I know,” Mads had said, “but he’s not all bad.” Regina had never had a good experience with Ulrich Nielsen, but she didn’t argue the point as they’d just arrived at her house. Mads had waved as he’d headed towards his own place, while Regina went in to heat up the pizza Claudia had left (once more, Claudia would not be joining her for dinner). She had no idea that that would be the last time she would ever see Mads Nielsen alive.
Her grandfather had come over, asking Regina exactly what time Mads had left her, because he’d never made it home. Claudia, who was home by that time, had stared at Egon in confusion, asked him why on earth Regina would know where Mads was; Regina had wondered why she was even surprised that her mother didn’t know that Mads was actually her best friend. Regina had suggested at first that Egon try talking to Ulrich and Katharina; Mads may have said that they had patched things up, but Ulrich had told Mads to “get lost” and now he was, and Regina wouldn’t put anything past Katharina. Just some stupid prank on their part that they’d dragged on too long, they’d let him go and he’d be back.
But Mads didn’t come home; despite the efforts of the search parties no trace of him was found, it soon became clear to Regina that Ulrich and Katharina weren’t involved after all, and she never saw him again.
That was the first time Regina’s world ended.
When Chief Dohring asked her afterwards, Regina had to admit it was odd that Claudia had suggested she skip school to spend the day together; she doubted she’d ever spent a whole day with her mother since she was a toddler. In the moment, she hadn’t thought that much of it beyond initially wondering why Claudia had said it; even if she hadn’t had an exam that day, Regina didn’t think she would take her up on it. Claudia had always made it clear that she didn’t understand Regina, didn’t have time for her, what would they even have to talk about if Regina had gone along with it?
What Regina did grieve when Claudia disappeared was the close relationship she could have had with her; even though the only real example of a close mother/child relationship she’d ever seen up close was Mads and Jana Nielsen (Hannah’s mother had died, Charlotte had never known hers, and even Regina, who no one really talked to, was aware of tensions between Katharina and her mother) Regina was always aware of what was missing in her life.
If anything, Regina felt more grief over her grandfather Egon, who had effectively stepped in as the parental figure in her life. Had he lived, he had been meant to be moving in with them; Regina had looked forward to the idea of coming home to someone who actually gave a crap. And she’d actually thought he was doing better, that his treatment was helping him, that she’d have ages yet with Egon, but now the one member of her family who’d made her feel like she mattered was gone, and she couldn’t understand why.
That was the second time Regina’s world ended.
Regina had finally felt like her world was coming together; her dream of turning the old Doppler place into the Waldhotel Winden was finally coming to fruition, she and Aleksander had gone from strength to strength (which was more than she could say for any other couples of her acquaintance; Charlotte and Peter were fooling nobody, and even she, who wasn’t friends with them, had picked up on something between Hannah and Ulrich), Bartosz was doing well and was happy. There was, of course, the fly in the ointment with Aleksander’s future employment, with the power plant being scheduled to close in 2020, but Regina was confident that by that time, the hotel would be turning enough of a profit to keep them going.
Even when the news first broke that Erik Obendorf was missing, Regina had thought little of it (it wouldn’t have been the first time that he had taken off over something minor; he would probably surface very soon, she kept telling herself that every day that went by, pushing away the memories of the search parties for Mads in 1986). When she’d tried arguing with Charlotte that too much was being made of it, she’d even believed it, even as people kept calling to cancel their bookings at the hotel. Regina still thought they could make it; Erik was most likely going to return, people would realise Winden was safe and would want to visit again, and she tried to tell herself that even after the disappearance of Mikkel Nielsen shortly afterwards.
What she hadn’t allowed for was breast cancer; she tried to deny it to herself, allowing Aleksander to believe the results hadn’t arrived even as they were trying to book her in for more treatment, and at that point told Bartosz nothing at all, why worry him about something that might not be serious? But it was no longer possible to hide it from him, from herself; as they started talking her through chemotherapy, Regina realised that she could no longer convince herself that this was nothing.
That was the third time Regina’s world ended.
Regina did not recognise the man that Clausen was describing, even as so much was starting to make sense to her; the way Aleksander had been so keen to change his name to hers, for example, was easier to explain now (anyone looking for Aleksander Kohler would be less likely to connect that name with Aleksander Tiedemann). It also explained why she had never met any of his friends or family from before he came to Winden; Regina had asked about inviting people to their wedding, and Aleksander had explained that his family were deceased and he’d chosen to break ties with the wrong crowd he’d associated with in Marburg. Much better to start as he meant to go on, with the new friends he had in Winden, Peter Doppler could stand as best man, no one from Marburg would be there. Even Bartosz had only ever asked about his family once, when he’d not long started school and needed to know for a family tree project, and then never brought it up again.
This man had made Regina feel loved when no one else had, had helped her through the disappearance of her mother and death of her grandfather, had been a brilliant father to Bartosz; Regina struggled to equate this with the story of the man who had shot and killed someone in Marburg, had been living under someone else’s identity for years. And she wasn’t even being given the opportunity to talk to her husband, to try and get his version of events; how was she supposed to make sense of it without even hearing his side?
As she waited for Bartosz to return, as she was confronted by her mother looking exactly the same as she had back in 1987 when she first disappeared, as Claudia talked of this apocalypse that made no sense to her, Regina felt that everything she had ever known was being turned on its head, began to fear that she would never see her husband or her son again.
That was the fourth time Regina’s world ended.
Winden is gone, the hotel that had previously been so important to her just a pile of rubble. Aleksander is dead; from what Regina understands he was killed on impact when the apocalypse arrived. Bartosz has never been seen since; although searches continue for anyone from Winden still unaccounted for, Regina no longer holds out hope that he will be found.
As Tronte Nielsen approaches her, Regina understands that this is the fifth time her world will end; it has ended so many times before, but this time it will be final.
Fandom: Dark.
Characters: Regina. (Aleksander, Bartosz, Egon, Claudia, Mads, Tronte)
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Character death, spoilers for S3
Word count: 1488
Summary: Regina understands that this is the fifth time her world will end; it has ended so many times before, but this time it will be final.
It had been just another day to Regina; she’d gone to school where she’d spent the day keeping her head down, avoiding Katharina Albers and her little gang. At least sometimes at breaks Mads could keep her company, although sometimes he’d hang out with his friends from his own year, as he did that day. Still, at least she’d be able to catch up with him properly at their fencing class.
Mads had walked her home as usual after class, Regina had asked him whether things were okay with him and Ulrich now after the argument they’d had the night before, where his brother had told him to “leave him alone and get lost”. Mads had shrugged, said they were back to normal (from what Regina understood, it was quite common for Mads and Ulrich to be arguing one moment but for it to have blown over the next). “He can be a dick, I know,” Mads had said, “but he’s not all bad.” Regina had never had a good experience with Ulrich Nielsen, but she didn’t argue the point as they’d just arrived at her house. Mads had waved as he’d headed towards his own place, while Regina went in to heat up the pizza Claudia had left (once more, Claudia would not be joining her for dinner). She had no idea that that would be the last time she would ever see Mads Nielsen alive.
Her grandfather had come over, asking Regina exactly what time Mads had left her, because he’d never made it home. Claudia, who was home by that time, had stared at Egon in confusion, asked him why on earth Regina would know where Mads was; Regina had wondered why she was even surprised that her mother didn’t know that Mads was actually her best friend. Regina had suggested at first that Egon try talking to Ulrich and Katharina; Mads may have said that they had patched things up, but Ulrich had told Mads to “get lost” and now he was, and Regina wouldn’t put anything past Katharina. Just some stupid prank on their part that they’d dragged on too long, they’d let him go and he’d be back.
But Mads didn’t come home; despite the efforts of the search parties no trace of him was found, it soon became clear to Regina that Ulrich and Katharina weren’t involved after all, and she never saw him again.
That was the first time Regina’s world ended.
When Chief Dohring asked her afterwards, Regina had to admit it was odd that Claudia had suggested she skip school to spend the day together; she doubted she’d ever spent a whole day with her mother since she was a toddler. In the moment, she hadn’t thought that much of it beyond initially wondering why Claudia had said it; even if she hadn’t had an exam that day, Regina didn’t think she would take her up on it. Claudia had always made it clear that she didn’t understand Regina, didn’t have time for her, what would they even have to talk about if Regina had gone along with it?
What Regina did grieve when Claudia disappeared was the close relationship she could have had with her; even though the only real example of a close mother/child relationship she’d ever seen up close was Mads and Jana Nielsen (Hannah’s mother had died, Charlotte had never known hers, and even Regina, who no one really talked to, was aware of tensions between Katharina and her mother) Regina was always aware of what was missing in her life.
If anything, Regina felt more grief over her grandfather Egon, who had effectively stepped in as the parental figure in her life. Had he lived, he had been meant to be moving in with them; Regina had looked forward to the idea of coming home to someone who actually gave a crap. And she’d actually thought he was doing better, that his treatment was helping him, that she’d have ages yet with Egon, but now the one member of her family who’d made her feel like she mattered was gone, and she couldn’t understand why.
That was the second time Regina’s world ended.
Regina had finally felt like her world was coming together; her dream of turning the old Doppler place into the Waldhotel Winden was finally coming to fruition, she and Aleksander had gone from strength to strength (which was more than she could say for any other couples of her acquaintance; Charlotte and Peter were fooling nobody, and even she, who wasn’t friends with them, had picked up on something between Hannah and Ulrich), Bartosz was doing well and was happy. There was, of course, the fly in the ointment with Aleksander’s future employment, with the power plant being scheduled to close in 2020, but Regina was confident that by that time, the hotel would be turning enough of a profit to keep them going.
Even when the news first broke that Erik Obendorf was missing, Regina had thought little of it (it wouldn’t have been the first time that he had taken off over something minor; he would probably surface very soon, she kept telling herself that every day that went by, pushing away the memories of the search parties for Mads in 1986). When she’d tried arguing with Charlotte that too much was being made of it, she’d even believed it, even as people kept calling to cancel their bookings at the hotel. Regina still thought they could make it; Erik was most likely going to return, people would realise Winden was safe and would want to visit again, and she tried to tell herself that even after the disappearance of Mikkel Nielsen shortly afterwards.
What she hadn’t allowed for was breast cancer; she tried to deny it to herself, allowing Aleksander to believe the results hadn’t arrived even as they were trying to book her in for more treatment, and at that point told Bartosz nothing at all, why worry him about something that might not be serious? But it was no longer possible to hide it from him, from herself; as they started talking her through chemotherapy, Regina realised that she could no longer convince herself that this was nothing.
That was the third time Regina’s world ended.
Regina did not recognise the man that Clausen was describing, even as so much was starting to make sense to her; the way Aleksander had been so keen to change his name to hers, for example, was easier to explain now (anyone looking for Aleksander Kohler would be less likely to connect that name with Aleksander Tiedemann). It also explained why she had never met any of his friends or family from before he came to Winden; Regina had asked about inviting people to their wedding, and Aleksander had explained that his family were deceased and he’d chosen to break ties with the wrong crowd he’d associated with in Marburg. Much better to start as he meant to go on, with the new friends he had in Winden, Peter Doppler could stand as best man, no one from Marburg would be there. Even Bartosz had only ever asked about his family once, when he’d not long started school and needed to know for a family tree project, and then never brought it up again.
This man had made Regina feel loved when no one else had, had helped her through the disappearance of her mother and death of her grandfather, had been a brilliant father to Bartosz; Regina struggled to equate this with the story of the man who had shot and killed someone in Marburg, had been living under someone else’s identity for years. And she wasn’t even being given the opportunity to talk to her husband, to try and get his version of events; how was she supposed to make sense of it without even hearing his side?
As she waited for Bartosz to return, as she was confronted by her mother looking exactly the same as she had back in 1987 when she first disappeared, as Claudia talked of this apocalypse that made no sense to her, Regina felt that everything she had ever known was being turned on its head, began to fear that she would never see her husband or her son again.
That was the fourth time Regina’s world ended.
Winden is gone, the hotel that had previously been so important to her just a pile of rubble. Aleksander is dead; from what Regina understands he was killed on impact when the apocalypse arrived. Bartosz has never been seen since; although searches continue for anyone from Winden still unaccounted for, Regina no longer holds out hope that he will be found.
As Tronte Nielsen approaches her, Regina understands that this is the fifth time her world will end; it has ended so many times before, but this time it will be final.
